I started asking out loud. Here's what happened.

Before we begin; a disclaimer.

I’m not going to tell you what to believe. I’m not going to ask you to buy into anything. You can call this manifestation, prayer, the law of attraction, the placebo effect, or just a series of remarkable coincidences. I genuinely don’t care what label you put on it. The label is not the point.

The point is what happened. And what keeps happening.

So approach this with whatever framework works for you, or with no framework at all. Approach it with curiosity, or even just for the banter. Because here’s the thing: you already have the no. The only thing you’ve got to gain is the life you actually want.

I packed my life into a bag and moved to Brazil alone.

After a heartbreak that broke me open in the way only the really significant ones do. No plan. No contacts. No Portuguese. Just a one-way ticket and the particular brand of recklessness that masquerades as courage when you have absolutely nothing left to lose.

The first few weeks were not transformative. They were just sad. I grieved properly and unglamorously. In the specific way that heartbreak and displacement and complete identity disorientation combine into something that feels like being dissolved. I lost touch of who I was without the relationship, without the career I was leaving, without the life I’d built and was now sitting five thousand miles away from. I'm not gonna sugar coat it, I was a fragile mess like never before.

One morning I sat by the ocean and did something I’d never consciously done before.

I surrendered. Fully. Without conditions.

Not the Instagram version of surrender, not a beautiful moment of peaceful release at golden hour. The ugly kind. The kind where you’ve run out of alternatives and you’re on your knees not because it’s poetic but because you genuinely don’t know what else to do. And in that moment, something shifted. Call it the universe, call it God, call it your nervous system finally releasing three months of white-knuckle control. I felt held. And I heard, somewhere deeper than my ears: I’ve got you.

So I asked. Out loud. To the ocean, to the air, to whatever was listening.

Show me the way. I want a home that makes me feel inspired. A shoulder I can actually lean on. A project that sets my soul on fire. I want to feel whole again. Show me you’ve got me.

Nothing happened.

Not that day. Not the next. I want to be honest about that because this is not a story about instant magic. It’s a story about what happens when you stop waiting for magic and start actively participating in the conversation.

In those days of silence I developed what I can only describe as a coping mechanism that was equal parts desperation and humour.

I started going on walks with my AirPods in.

Not listening to anything. Just walking and talking —out loud— fully committed to the bit. I figured if I was going to be delusional, I might as well be thoroughly delusional. And with AirPods in you don't look unhinged, you just look like someone having a very intense conversation with you manager. I would describe my dream home in detail. I would brainstorm my next creative project out loud. I would describe the friend group I wanted; the specific kind of people, the specific kind of energy, the specific kind of conversations I was starving for.

Getting specific. Embarrassingly specific. Because I’d asked once and nothing came, so I figured maybe — universe, God, subconscious mind, whatever you want to call it, needed more information.

Still nothing.

About a week in, I woke up with one overwhelming thought.

I need to surf. Right now. But I don’t know where the breaks are (That's what had been stopping me from surfing until that point)

I said it out loud "fuck it, I'm going surfing, I'll figure out the spots." and walked outside.

My neighbour was walking to his car with a board under his arm. He looked up.

"Hey, you surf?"

"Yes!"

"Let’s go. Waves are on."

You know that feeling? When something you thought and something that happened are so perfectly, impossibly aligned that your nervous system doesn’t know what to do with it? Like the gap between intention and reality just collapsed?

That. Exactly that.

Something instantly shifted in that moment. Like a frequency I’d been trying to tune into suddenly came through clear.

From there, everything started moving.

A woman in a café started chatting with me. I mentioned I was looking for somewhere to live long term. She showed me photos of her place. I said; Holy shit I want somewhere EXACTLY like that! A few days later I ran into her again. She told me she had to leave the island and asked if I wanted to take over her lease.

I moved in within the week.

My new neighbor became the endlessly creative fabulously gay best friend I’d always wanted and somehow never had.

I started writing. Started designing. Started building the thing I’d been circling for years; the journal that became Unlocking Myself.

I fell into a Brazilian friend group, learned the language, surfed empty breaks, hid out in the jungle, adopted a couple of monkeys, and created without limits for one of the most extraordinary year of my life.

Here’s what I actually want to tell you.

Not the magic of what happened; what I believe to be the mechanics of how. Because I’ve put this to the test many times since. Consciously. Deliberately. And the results keep being extraordinary.

Call it what you want. Manifestation, prayer, intention-setting, focused subconscious priming... The neuroscientists will tell you that what you focus on shapes what you notice, and what you notice shapes what you act on, and what you act on shapes what you get. The spiritual people will tell you the universe responds to energy. The religious will tell you God rewards faith. Honestly? I don’t think they’re saying different things. I think they’re describing the same phenomenon from different angles.

And the phenomenon is this: There is a direct relationship between the quality of presence and trust you bring to your life and the quality of what shows up in it.

Not because the universe is a vending machine you put intentions into. But because when you show up with full, embodied, I trust this energy - you start noticing different things, taking different actions, saying yes to different conversations, walking outside at the exact moment your neighbor happens to be walking to his car with a surfboard.

The mechanism matters less than the result. Ask specifically, embody the feeling of already having it, and watch what the conversation does next.

The secret ingredient.

It’s not positivity. It’s not visualization. It’s not gratitude journaling.

It’s embodiment.

The moment the surfboard neighbor appeared wasn’t the first moment I asked for waves. It was the moment I felt it; the excitement, the aliveness, the genuine hunger. Not I would like to surf I need to find the spots but I am a surfer, and I will surf today. I stopped transmitting want and started transmitting trust.

Take part in the conversation.
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Life is an intricuit ongoing dialogue. You're not just some passive listener in this cosmic exchange. Whether you realize it or not, you're an active participant, shaping the dialogue with every choice you make.

Think about it. Your attitude, your decisions – they're like the punctuation in this grand narrative. Choose positivity, and suddenly the universe is throwing confetti in your direction. But let negativity take the reins? Well, don't be surprised if the universe starts throwing a few curveballs your way.

Now, I get it. Life isn't always rainbows and sunshine. It's messy, it's unpredictable, and sometimes it feels like you're just shouting into the void. But here's the thing; if you get intentional with it- you've got the power to steer this conversation in whatever direction you choose.‍

Your invitation.

Try it. For thirty days. With whatever belief system you have, or with none at all. Approach it as an experiment. A game. Something to do for the banter.

Get specific about what you want. Say it out loud somewhere you won’t be watched. AirPods optional but highly recommended. Describe the actual texture of the life you want — not I want to be happy but the home, the people, the feeling of your days, the project, the version of yourself.

Then notice your body as you speak it. Find the words that make something in your chest expand rather than contract. The ones that feel like recognition rather than aspiration.

Those are the ones that are already true.

The rest is just the conversation catching up. Keep discussing those desires, in great detail, daily. Alone, to others, in your notes app at 2am, on your AirPods walk, wherever. Only rule is to keep the conversation flowing. And as you do — this is the part that matters— channel that excitement feeling as if it's around the corner.

You already have the no. You’ve only got the life of your dreams to gain. Go for it. After all, you never know where a little purposeful conversation might lead you.

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